20 August 2009

Grammar Lessons from the Future English Teacher: Installment 3

Today's lesson will be: The Correct Use of "I" and "Me."


Contrary to popular belief, you DO NOT ALWAYS USE "I." THIS IS VITAL, PEOPLE. PAY ATTENTION.



This sentence is correct: Lexie and I are going to the moon.

The reason this sentence is correct is because Lexie and I are the subjects. However, if we were the objects, YOU CAN'T USE "I."

This sentence is incorrect: The goat kicked Lexie and I.

NO NO NO NO NO. It's easier to see if we remove Lexie: The goat kicked I. Would you ever say that? No. No you wouldn't. You would say, "the goat kicked me." So don't say I if you're the object of the sentence. If you do, I will kill you. I will. Don't think that I won't. I'll come after you.

This sentence is correct: The goat kicked Lexie and me.

A special reminder for my Facebook friends aka the largest known source of incorrect grammar: If you are captioning a picture, DO NOT say "this is so-and-so and I." That is WRONG. Say instead "this is so-and-so and ME." Ok? Ok.

***So remember, if you are ever in doubt, just remove the other person and figure out what you would say if you were only talking about yourself. It's not difficult. I know you can do it. I have faith in all of you.***

16 August 2009

Adventures in the Kitchen: Poblano Soup

I love spicy things.

Cream o' poblano is one of my favorite soups, so I thought I'd try it. I altered the recipe I found, because it called for canned poblano peppers (ew) and not enough cilantro (of course). I also thought it needed cumin and garlic, so I added those too. Here be my final recipe:

Poblano Soup




Ingredients:

6 tbsp butter
1 white onion, sliced
3 fresh poblano peppers, sliced
2-3 cloves garlic, chopped
2 cups chicken stock
2-3 tbsp cilantro, chopped
1 cup heavy cream
1/4 tsp cumin
4 corn tortillas, cut into strips
shredded jack cheese (to top off)
salt and pepper to taste

Directions:

Melt the butter in a pot; fry the onion and garlic. When the onion begins to turn clear, add the poblano. Fry for about 5 minutes. Set this mixture aside to cool. Keep the heat on and fry the tortilla strips in the leftover butter. Salt these and set them aside on a paper towel. Take the poblano/onion/garlic mixture and puree it with the chicken stock and cilantro until it's relatively smooth. Return the mixture to the pot and heat it up again. Add cream, cumin, and salt and pepper to taste. Serve with shredded cheese and tortilla strips on top! Nom.

*On a side note, you may want to wear gloves while slicing the poblano peppers. I didn't, and my hands burned for about 24 hours. You've been warned.

**On another side note, the fried tortilla strips are one of the best things I've ever tasted. Ever.

13 August 2009

Adventures in the Kitchen: Guacamole

Now that I've graduated and am once again living at home while I wait for the TEFL ball to start rolling, I've found myself with quite a bit of free time. One thing that I did a lot at school (but not quite as much as I wanted to) was cook; now seems like a good time to start it up again. I've somehow convinced my parents to let me have a grocery budget, so I've decided to peruse the internet for fun recipes and share all my kitchen adventures. Lucky you.

This first one though, I've been making for a while and is nottttttt from the internet. A Mexican friend initially taught me how to make guacamole, and I've since tweaked it a little bit. I know it's not technically "cooking," but I've been told it's pretty good and have been asked how to make it, so here it is. Measurements are more estimates than anything, but I tried to be as accurate as possible and pay attention to how much I was using this time. So, here it is:

Vee's Guacamole! I hope you like my happy cilantro garnish.


Ingredients:

2-3 large avocados
1/2 white onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tomato, diced
1 jalapeƱo, diced (keep the seeds for more spice)
1/2 cup cilantro, chopped
1 large lime
1 tbsp vinegar
1 tbsp salt (at least!)
1 tsp chicken bouillon powder


Directions:

Peel avocados and mash them with a fork. As soon as you've done this, squeeze the lime over them (this keeps them from getting brown). Mix in all other ingredients, and add more salt/lime juice if needed. Mmm tasty. Now go get some chips.

12 August 2009

Grammar Lessons from the Future English Teacher: Installment 2

First thing.

To everyone who shows up on my Facebook newsfeed: STOP USING "YOUR" WHEN YOU SHOULD BE USING "YOU'RE," AND STOP USING APOSTROPHES FOR PLURALS. YOU ARE IN COLLEGE, PEOPLE. MOST OF YOU HAVE GRADUATED. JESUS CHRIST.

Now, that's out of the way. If you missed the first lesson, never fear. Here it is: Clicky click.

Due to popular demand, I'm going to make a whole post about homophones. For those of you who missed this day in FIRST GRADE, homophones are words that sound alike but are spelled differently. I know, really confusing.

Here is a very helpful website, if you're having trouble with confusing words (not all are homophones - Thanks, Sharon):

http://homepage.smc.edu/reading_lab/words_commonly_confused.htm

There are a ton, but I'm going to focus on some that I feel are the most common. Let's revisit the most annoying ones (to me) first, because somehow people are still making mistakes after my first post. I mean obviously everyone read it, so I don't know what's going on.

your vs. you're

Once again, "your" signifies possession. Example: That is YOUR bad.

"You're" means "you are." The apostrophe is REPLACING THE 'A.' Example: YOU'RE a d-bag.

I don't know how to make that one much clearer.

Another that I've already addressed but needs to be mentioned...


it's vs. its

It's = IT IS. Use "its" when talking about something inanimate possessing something else.

Example: IT'S really sad that the food has lost ITS flavor.

I know this one is really super hard because "its" is possessive and omg there is no apostrophe, but GET OVER IT AND REMEMBER IT.

Now, the one that everyone couldn't believe wasn't in the first post...


they're, their, there

Oh shit, now there are three choices. What do we do? We take a breath and think about it for a millisecond before we write it.

"They're" means "they are."

"Their" means relating to them (adj).

"There" means "in that matter, respect, or relation" (adv).

Example: THEY'RE getting more food for THEIR platypus over THERE in the pond.


accept vs. except

"Accept" is a verb that means "to receive willingly."

"Except" is a preposition that means "but" or "with the exception of."

Example: I ACCEPT all of your flaws, EXCEPT the fact that you have poor grammar.


than vs. then

Technically not homophones, but they might as well be with the way we speak in the US. No one knows how to use them correctly anyway.

"Than" is used to indicate difference (conj).

"Then" means next or consequently (adv).

Example: I use correct grammar more often THAN you do; I am going to make a post about it, and THEN I expect you to try harder.


whose vs. who's

Whose means "of or relating to whom or which esp. as possessor or possessors" (adj).

Who's is a contraction of who and is.

Example: WHOSE clothes are these? They belong to that guy WHO'S skinny dipping. Let's hide them.


Okay so these are the ones that everyone usually screws up. Let me know if you think of any more good ones, and I'll add them.

Please please please visit this website, and make sure you understand all of the words on it.